The world keeps on turning - from divorce to being a single mum to a new family!
It would take me forever to recap the years between being diagnosed and my biggest MS relapse, and I am not one for writing 3000 words at a time so I will try and give you a brief overview but this photo says it all (and aww how cute my son and stepsons looked before the teenage years kicked in!)
Time flies when you are having fun!
2003 to 2006
I loved being a mum, having been a nanny in the states when I was 18/19 having just one child to devote myself too was really easy. I had learnt lots during my childcare education and being a nanny that I found the whole experience easy. Aside from the 'psychosomatic symptoms' I endured after my initial consultant experience I forgot about the MS and just carried on with my life and raising Jake and being a wife. During that time I did have an issue with numbness in my left hand - it was just my pinky and ring fingers that were impacted. I saw a doctor, who referred me and I ended up having a nerve test along my arm. The results were clear, the nerves were fine and we put it down to the fact that I had compressed the nerve in my elbow by doing too much computer work. Of course, we know now that it would have been to do with my MS but no one mentioned this, and because the consultant's theory made sense I just assumed that was the case. I still have two numb feeling fingers, they work fine and I can feel with them but they just had an odd numb sensation that's never left. Bizarre!
At the end of 2006 my husband declared he was leaving us - let's not dwell on this for too long. He cheated, I got over it much quicker than you would expect and came to the realisation we were never really compatible (the joys of marrying your first real love). We had our son who I will be forever grateful for but life is too short to be down in the dumps for long. The day he told me he wanted a divorce was the day I discovered my contract job at my job was not being continued. I remember going to one of my best friend's house and bursting into tears - divorce and job loss in one hit - I cried for about five minutes. I then said I'm going home to find a new job. It was probably a week later I had a new job. To this day my friend commends me on my attitude to just get on with it. Life is too short to sit around waiting..
Health-wise during these years I did suffer with IBS but again on seeing a specialist MS was never mentioned. During my marriage breakup and divorce I had dropped from 8 stones to 7 stones which when you are small is quite a big drop in weight. Apparently when you have a significant weight loss and then start eating properly again it can trigger IBS (this is what I was told at the time), so again - a theory that made sense. So nothing further was discussed but of course now we know IBS is pretty common in people with MS!
Only you can help yourself in life, if you want something done then get up and get on with it.
2007 to 2011
People say that single life is fun, and don't get me wrong it is but I think we are programmed to be with others and as a middle child I have always been a people person. I hate being on my own, and even if you have your child at home with you, it's not the same as having another adult there with you. I dated quite a lot in that time, I am not going to go into the ins and outs of the dating world in your 30s but it had joys and woes but ultimately it led me to meeting my husband, Stu. He's my rock and without him I think the last five years would have been so much harder for me. I said to him once, that I wonder if he came into my life for a reason and that my MS downturn waited until I had someone solid by my side. I am sure that isn't the case but I am as I've said before a believer in things happening for a reason. Perhaps one day I will tell you how we met but for now all you need to know if he makes my journey so much easier.
Having someone who is truly there with you makes the journey so much easier
2011 to 2014
We dated, we married and what a fantastic wedding we had. Again I may touch on this in future posts.
Health-wise during this period I suffered from lower back pain - this lasted for about two years. I was referred for an MRI as physio made no difference. I do remember vividly a phone call with my doctor at that time saying the MRI showed white patches on my spine but she said they would have been there when you were diagnosed in 2003 so don't think they are relevant!!! When I look back now I seriously have to question how this wasn't taken further - how I wasn't referred to a neurologist but of course I was living in MS denial so it suited my outlook. Bizarrely the backache disappeared about two weeks before our wedding - I kid you not, I was at work and I slammed my ring finger in the steel safe door - I remember the pain and the shock vividly! My boss took me straight to A&E. My finger was bruised but thankfully still there and moving - BUT more importantly my back no longer hurt! Have you ever heard of pain displacement theory? Well according to my osteopath at the time, this was a clear case of that, the shock of the intense pain from the accident stopped my back pain. It never came back... bizarre hey!
2015 onwards
In February 2015, I went with Stu on a business trip to New York - I perhaps should have considered this trip more carefully, as someone who hates being cold February in New York is most definitely not warm! Cue their worst winter on record with windchill up to minus 30... we must have been crazy sight-seeing around the city in the freezing cold. I wish I had known then that extreme weather can cause MS relapses... I don't know why this and I am not really the researching type but feel free to explain in the comments below. All I know is that MS has ruined my love of sunbathing and I won't be skiing ever again, forgetting the mobility issues it's the cold that puts me off! It was just so cold and I had no idea it was damaging my body!
We actually had a neurologist appointment booked as we were thinking about having a baby together (stupid idea, we got a puppy instead!) - in April we went to the consultant appointment and that's when life changed..... cue new blog post as I think this deserves it's own story.
Extreme weather can cause relapses! Stay away from ski slopes and hot destinations!
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